OMG! I'm a man!!!

I'm a dude!!!

No, I did NOT realize this while standing naked in front of a full-length mirror this morning. (my deepest apologies for the mental image this might have given you)

This was based on hacker factor's gender guesser. (Yes, I have nothing else to do with my time, bite me!)

I entered 3 past blog entries and got a 3 out of 3 "dude, you're a big burly hairy man" result. (well, they did not exactly phrased it that way... although it would have been more fun if they did...). Actually, they said I was a "weak Male". That's probably their "politically correct version" of a "girly-man".

Now how sad is that... It's bad enough that they think I'm male, they have to add insult to injury by putting in "weak". They also added "Weak emphasis could indicate European.". Aha... so they do mean "girly man"... hehehe...

Slightly Off-Topic: This reminds me of some online game I saw not so long ago wherein you're shown series of pictures and you have to guess: "Gay guy or Euro-trash". (Yes, I kill too many braincells for stupid things... in my defense, I WAS young... hehehe...)

Going back...

Before I rant any further (and hurl a few inanimate objects around the house), the website did indicate a few disclaimers:

Many factors can impact the interpretation from any single person's writing. The
content, knowledge of the material, age of the author, nationality, experience,
occupation, and education level can all impact writing styles. For example, a
woman who has spent 20 years working in a male-dominated field may write like
her co-workers. Similarly, professional female writers (and experienced
hobbyists) frequently use male writing styles. Gender Guesser does not take any
of these factors into account.

--> I grew up in a household full of men... does that count? (Yes, I'm trying to justify the result... I'M NOT A MAN!!!!)

Pasting the same text multiple times will not change the results!

--> mwaaaahaaahahaha... I actually tried doing this before I even read this part in the "author's notes"... It's the skeptic in me... (and I'm pretty sure alot of people did this too...:) )

And most importantly: This is an ESTIMATE. Please do not email me about
instances where it made the wrong determination. (I've seen it generate
incorrect results lots of times already.)

--> is this supposed to make me feel better? or is it just the author's way of avoiding raving lunatics like me from spamming him? I'm guessing both... hehehe...

my everyday funny things

I was waiting for my collection to reach 10 before I share them, but I am way too bored so I'm doing it now...

#1

When you hear a conversation that's something like this:

Saleslady: "Yes, what do you want?"

Customer: "Malay ko!" (I wouldn't know!)

You'd more or less expect a word fight to break-out between those two. But not here in Singapore, especially when you're in this "Siopao Store".

Ma Lai Ko I think is some pastry? I guess if you'd ask me, it's safe for me to say "aba, malay ko?!"

#2

Because this blogpost is about funny things, of course it wouldn't be complete without any "remember-to-mock-jas-statements". So jas, this one's for you! (peace!)

mock the duck! mock the duck! mock the duck!

#3

I like going around in bookstores, even when I don't intend to buy any book. I find a certain sense of peace doing it. But somehow this one trip I had to the bookstore didn't do that...

Does anyone remember laughing while reading "A Walk to Remember" or "The Notebook" ? Hmmnn... I guess they find it funny... ???

the "humour" section in a bookstore

#4
One factor to consider when moving here to Singapore is the food. Sadly, there is no Jollibee outlet here yet. You know why? Because when Jollibee tried to cross from Philippines to Singapore, poof! he turned into a bean...

i was told that this store is NOT at all related to jollibee, so forget the bee-to-bean fairytale I told you. (shame on you if you believed it though! hehehe...)

#5
Need to wipe yourself clean? Try...

tekla... hhmmmn... i wonder how it smells... :)

#6

And looking at #5 reminded me of an old picture I shared a few posts ago...

tom tae..."genuine taste from the..." i can't read the next word... is it sea? who cares?

it's like having chicken pox minus the chicken pox!

I received a phonecall last week from the HR dept. of my new company. My employment pass has been approved by M.O.M. and all I need to do is just undergo the standard medical examination. She also informed me that my first day of work is on October 1. Whaaaat?!!! That means I have another two weeks to be a bum. But the thing is... I'M BORED!!! I want to work! --> I never thought I'd say that at any point in my life!

Two weeks?!! what the hell am I gonna do in that span of time?

I don't want to go out... I'm too lazy... And besides, there's really no point of going around too much, it's not like I'm on vacation... I'll be here for a really long time. I'm afraid if I go out too much, I'll exhaust the excitement out of whatever interesting place there is on this little island.

I'm tired of reading books, technical books atleast(the only ones they have here in the flat). I'm currently reading "Mastering Unix". IMHO, they should have named it "Unix for Beginners" instead. It covers too many topics but doesn't go in-depth on what's really going on. Too broad, but awfully shallow, and damn heavy as well! Good book for those who are new to Unix and wants to be acquainted to what it can do, but if you're already a professional with a few years experience with unix/linux systems and would want to know what's really going on when you execute a command, go get yourself another book (perhaps a lighter one, unless you want more muscles...).

Now, going back to my rants...

I'm tired of watching TV with really lame news. It's my 45th day and I still haven't heard a single mention of any killings in the news... c'mon! that can't be possible! Not that I'm praying that some bored person go on a killing-spree or something(I think I'm the only bored person around here anyway)... I just find it hard to believe that no one has been committing those kinds of crimes. Perhaps the news agencies aren't just reporting them??? --> just goes to show how much faith I have in goodness of mankind!

I've cleaned the house, did all my laundry, ironed all of my clothes(even those that don't need ironing!), uploaded pictures in my flickr account, installed my VM in this PC, read every blogpost i'm subscribed to (even clicking "refresh" all to often), and now i have absolutely ran out of something to do!

Oh! It's dinner time! Now I have something to do! --> pathetic eh?

Funny how a few months back, I was ranting about not having time for myself...
ah! humans!... what complex and often discontented creatures! especially this one.

breaking news: my 1st SG earthquake!

Just a few minutes ago, an earthquake which rated a whopping 7.9 in the Richter scale hit Indonesia. The tremors were felt here in Singapore.

We're on the 15th floor, so I really felt it!

Soooo cool.... :)

So now I can say that I have experienced earthquakes in 3 different countries: Philippines, Japan, and now Singapore. Not that I have any intention of collecting "them"... :)

On the news on TV just now, they are interviewing a Singaporean office employee who evacuated from their office building during the tremors. He said that he's just waiting so that they can go back to their building... Let me see... There's an earthquake and he can't wait to go back to work???

Well, that still doesn't beat my Japan earthquake experience: No one in the office didn't even care that there was an earthquake, they just don't f**ing care!

Can we then conclude that 1st world developed countries are composed of people who do not care if they are in the middle of a natural disaster? Maybe the Philippines should start doing this.... just be completely blase about disasters and problems, or better yet, be in complete and utter denial :

"Baha? Anung baha? Nasan ang baha?"[glirk glirk]
- Tomasino sa gitna ng Espana habang bumabagyo

Hmmmnn... nah... I don't think that would work... :)

snippets of info : salary package

Salary package... now this is a touchy subject. But it's seemingly the most asked question to me lately.

I won't be disclosing my salary here, since i find that unethical (and I'm also bound by a confidentiality contract).

I would just like to share the several salary packages I encountered while I was job-hunting here in SG. I hope this might help future jobhunters weigh their options.

Basically there are two types of employment:

1. Direct hire
Those hired directly by the company they are working for.

2. Contractual (a.k.a. via Agency)
Those hired by an employment agency and will be deployed to a client company.

Direct hires usually have a lower salary compared to contractual employees. This might sound puzzling for others, but there is actually a good reason behind it. Direct hires have company benefits while contractual employees on the other hand do not have any. Usual benefits include:
- 13th month pay
- health and life insurance
- annual bonus
- paid leaves

Contractual employees are hired by employment agencies and are then sent to client companies. They usually stay in that company for 1 or 2 years then move-on to other companies, unless their contracts are renewed by their current client company. The higher pay given to them is to compensate for their lack of company benefits.

Each type has it's pros's and con's, depending on each person's preferences. If you're the type who gets sick often in a year, #1 is the way to go. Medical expenses here are awfully high! If you're the type who likes to save a lot of money, and doesn't get sick regularly, go with option #2. If you value job security, go with option #1. If you like trying out new companies every year, go with #2.

If you're thinking of being a Permanent Resident here in SG, option #1 is better for you. Permanent Residents MUST contribute 33% of their monthly income to their CPF (forced savings). If you're a direct hire, 20 of the 33% will be shouldered by your company. If you're a contractual employee, you have to shoulder all of the 33% (ouch!)

I'm not so sure if there are "hybrid" versions out there, but these are the ones I have encountered.

I guess my advice would be to not just look at the money you'll be getting every month. Try to also assess what other benefits the company could give you that will best fit your lifestyle.

Kampong Glam Tour

After nearly a month of being a full-pledged couch potato in a foreign land, I decided to do something beyond the walls of our flat. So yesterday, I reluctantly detached my tush from our couch and went out for an "adventure".

First off, I needed to decide which place to go to. After much internal debate (a good 5 minutes! :) ), I decided to go to Kampong Glam. (Special thanks to Donna for the walking guide) With map, bus guide, walking guide, and compass on hand, I dashed to the nearest bus stop.

map, bus guide, kampong glam walking guide, and compass

I rode a #80 doubledeck-type bus. Being that it was my first time ever to ride one, I sat on the front seat of the "second floor". It was a 1-hour trip. Considering the distance and number of bus stops, I'd say it was a fast trip. I could have gone faster if I took the MRT, but that wouldn't be half as fun. :)

distance from point A to point B : 20.3 km

I took some pictures of several Chinese stores I saw while inside the bus. I even saw jas in one of them... hehehe... :)

si jas!

old Singapore shops (not so clean-looking lah?)

Several bus stops later, I had to alight and walk my way to my first stop: The Malay Heritage Center, also known as Istana Kampong Glam.

This used to be the place where the Malay rulers held court. Istana means "palace" in Malay. Now, it serves as a historical landmark and museum of Malay culture.

Entrance to the Istana grounds is free. (Why else would I be there if it weren't?) However, the museum admission costs 3SGD per head. Being the cheap-ass bastard that I am, I skipped the museum. :)

There were several people that day as well. There was a tour full of Caucasians and there were people shooting a music video of some Indian song (Off-Topic: there's something about Indian songs that make me laugh... and i mean the condescending kind of laugh you wouldn't want to do if your surrounded by strangers, so I tried my best to get a hold of myself... walk away... walk away... then laugh! :) ).

Since there were many people around, (and I'm trying desperately to stay away from the music video people) the only pictures I got are these:

the sad thing is, i was such in a hurry, i don't even know what the hell is this!?!

i saw this lying around the walkway. i love the contrast in color. but upon close inspection, i noted that this was a fake flower. probably used by the music video people as props. (and again, i giggle each time i remember...)

To the right of the Istana is the Sultan Mosque:

Sultan Mosque. non-Muslims are welcome as long as they are fully covered (long sleeves and pants/long skirt).

Near the mosque is a pathway lined with several cafes and souvenir shops.

the pathway

old map of the area

Basically, that's it. There are a few more shops in the other streets but I wasn't able to take pictures of them.

Next adventure... Chinatown... when?... i dunno... hehehe... :)

now this will cause a lot of heat!

According to this post, Malu Fernandez will be back on Manila Standard Today.

Just a week ago, she allegedly resigned and issued a public apology after writing an article recounting her "horrible" experiences during her trip. The article "From Boracay to Greece" started a few fires over the internet after it offended (that being an understatement) our OFWs working in the middle east.

So basically, after a week, Manila Standard decided to bring her back in.

Is this for real? I mean, do they seriously believe that people, especially the OFWs have already forgotten about this issue? Whether this article is true or not, she better saddle-up, because I'm pretty sure people will not let it go just like that.

My 2 cents on the issue is quite simple. C'mon, admit it, on certain times and occasions it's really fun to "insult" people or a certain group of people. I myself am guilty of writing nasty stuff about other people in my blog. And if you'd read my diary, you'd come across several shades of insults from downright silly to insensitively indignant. It's a guilty pleasure I do not wish to deny myself or other people of.

A few dash of insults here and there adds life to the party, but then again, this ain't a party, and her article is surely not just an ordinary blog post or diary entry.

I'm no journalist, but I think there has to be a line somewhere. And I think that's where Ms. Malu and her editor made a mistake. Some things are just meant for your diary. ( just have your diary published when your dead, that way, death threats won't mean anything to you, incase you offend someone :) )

We're all guilty of offensive behaviour and stereotyping. The trick is finding the right time, place, and medium.


That's why in not in journalism... too much moral responsibility (plus spell-checking and proof-reading!.... im not even sure if the previous words have hyphens in them!?!) hehehe...