nihongo speech???

got an email yesterday regarding our nihongo final exams...

"the examinations will not be in regular test format; rather, we will be holding a class-wide NIHONGO SPEECH CONTEST, patterned after the JFM's recently concluded NIHONGO SPEECH CONTEST."

what???!!!!

i cant even write a complete sentence?!?!.... and i am expected to deliver a speech??? what????
nyaaahahahhaaaa... im doomed.. :I

since i've got no choice... fine...fine...fine... matagal pa naman! hehehe...

last night, i started thinking of possible speech titles... hehehe

1) nihongo ga wakarimasen (i dont understand japanese)
-title and actual essay itself. probably the shortest essay i've ever written...

2) toire wa doko desu ka? iie benjo, iie....iie... (where is the toilet?... not the japanese style...no...no...)
-a girl's life-long search for a western-style cr

3) kore.... kore..... kore.... (this...this...this)
-speech which consists of nothing but "kore" and an awful lot of props. although there are moments when an object is thrown far, then "sore" is used...

4) urutura-erekuturo-magunetiku- otearai... (ultraelectromagnetic toilet)
-the super hightech toilet that turns into a fighter-robot when evil strikes...plus, it makes cute (and obviously recorded) flushing sounds during battle and makes sure that everyone is comfy through its well-heated and fully-deodorized toilet seat...

5) ahiru-chan jodan (duckie/jas jokes)
-nihongo compilation of the infamous duck jokes....

so far... yan pa lang naiisip ko... hhmmnn... probably because those are the only japanese words i know?!!! except for my favorite..."ohayou" hehehe...

thanks nga pla ke ben... sa kanya ko tinanong yung nihongo ng "joke"... hehehe...